Here is the latest reader request:"Lately my human self has felt some struggles related to friendships with other women. Having been a woman in most of my lifetimes, I have noticed some old patterns of competition and jealousy come to the surface, even with friends who are conscious and going through their experience of enlightenment. This also relates to the topic of allowing ourselves to shine. I understand that we lose some friends when we allow ourselves to be our authentic, radiating selves. But it would also be great to still have a few human friendships here. What are your (and El Morya’s) perspectives on this?"
This is a great question and one I have pondered for lifetimes. I have a lot of personal experience with it (also having been a woman in many lifetimes), and I'm going to share some of my Lauren human experiences and wisdom from Sar'h, who has navigated my human self through these experiences, but first Master M.
When it comes to human relationships, Master M, is a bit harsh. He says with energy not words that we are not here to be liked.
"Who cares?" he has asked me when I whined about the energy of competition among girlfriends and energetically draining boyfriends.
"Why do you keep putting yourself in these situations?" he would ask - not to be cold and callous but to present a question for me to answer deeply at the soul level. Why was I continuing to allow myself to be distracted?
He indicated the further we step into Divine Will, the less we will need and desire human friendships. He says instead friendships take a sweet turn in the embodied enlightenment experience, although they are quality not quantity.
He also warned that just like when we go through a human awakening and those in mass consciousness stare at us like we are crazy, when we step into divine will those still creating and playing in human will, will also look at us with the eyes of human judgement. We must remember it is not really them, but the human will clinging onto the soul for dear life that judges.
"Many will say they are choosing enlightenment. They will play the part extremely well. It will appear as if they have it all together on these social media sites, and people will be drawn to them for a time.
Yet, in the end, many will not be willing to forgo the human comforts (he's not talking about renunciation of material possessions, but of human attachments, such as co-dependent relationships and a desire to be liked, for example) that must be shed to have the full experience.
As I said before, they will jump at a chance for the $100 (or the supposed conscious handsome dude - Lauren add), a dozen others are fighting for - not once or twice or three times, and finally learn the lesson, but over and over again.
For those of you becoming or already sitting in your divine will space, you will know deeply, for you, it was never a choice but a will of your soul so deep and so strong to know it is God, also, that there was never a way to stay in the human will circles.
Like Lauren - and some of you did this a long time ago - after diving after the $100 bill for the last time, you will say no more. You will step back, breathe and be, allowing the riches of Divine Will to simply appear in your hand (and the super actually conscious dude will appear).
And you will not have the desire to share with your fellow humans "choosing" enlightenment instead of being it, because it is too much of an energetic expense and you know they will not be able to comprehend it.
Like we have been talking about for many months, in divine will there is no longer judgment, but a fined-tuned discernment, which could not be perceived while still operating in human free will."
After my first book was published or birthed, I decided to have a party to celebrate. As you know, I do not have children, and the book was my baby. It was almost like a baby shower or my child's first birthday party.
I invited friends, made a huge meal, bought amazing wine, and opened my house to my Colorado community. I didn't mind the effort because it was a celebration I wanted to share with friends. Writing a book is a solitary experience, so being around people was a real treat.
I had books for sale for $10, but did not push it and kept them in the corner. It was simply there if someone wanted to buy it.
Now in human worlds, if I were back in Austin, Texas, my friends would have put on this event for me. They would have walked around the room, letting people know the book is for sale.
At this time in my life, I was still transitioning from my human friends who outwardly showed their support as I did for them. For example, when they had a baby, I showed up to do their laundry for a month, because having a baby is hard. When I got a divorce, they came and packed up my belongings while I cried in a corner. When there was something to celebrate, we planned a party. When there was a problem to solve, we got on group text and solved it. It was simple and a given.
I learned quickly that would not happen in Colorado and I accepted it as part of moving from awakening into enlightenment, so I was able to drop my expectations there. In Colorado, I learned it was everyone for themselves, which I get - super sovereignty I can dig. For example, when I first moved there, I asked for some help and was given a stern NO. So I asked a human friend who was happy to help. Problem solved.
But something more was boiling in the pot so deeply since I moved there, and it came to a head. It was ugly, but a huge gift, for it came up to be released - the energy of competition.
More than half the people who came to the party were really truly happy for me. They purchased a book, said congratulations. They brought a dish to share. They saw me and how much work and courage went into the book.
Others came, ate and drank, never mentioned the book, talked about themselves, and energetically put a wall up between me and them. Here I was the fat kid with thick glasses in junior high again. Why didn't they like me???? I was trying so hard to fit into their rules, be self sufficient, say the right things (as I was constantly corrected for my word choices). It was exhausting. Why did these people show up to only talk to their friends and shun me?
I cried for a couple of days the victim crocodile tears, and asked my soul, what am I do wrong?
"First of all, stop trying to play by their rules. They feel the energy of you trying to please them, and it is like making yourself a target. More importantly, can't you see this is about them. You wrote the book they have been trying to write (figurative, not literal). You are creating! The ones who are happy for you, are in a state of self-love. The others are not YET. Have compassion and move on. "
That can't be it, I thought, I must be doing something wrong. But I went on with my life, and went straight into the 30-days of self-love experience, which changed everything. For those of you who read it, you already know I was not fully in love with myself before I left, and now I sense it deeply.
When I got back to Colorado after the 30 days, one woman came up to me at a group event.
"I want to apologize. The last time I saw you at the party at your house, I did not like you. I talked bad about you. I am so sorry. It was really that I was not loving myself, and seeing you happy and thriving made me feel bad about me. It is nothing you did. It was me."
She gave me a hug. She was genuine. All was and is forgiven. It was a magical moment for me.
AND right after that, another woman sensing my radiance, came up to me and said, "I do not like your human self, but I can honor you at the soul level."
The words felt like darts, the energy competitive and aggressive, yet I could see it was not her talking to me, but this old energy of competition.
The difference - it flowed right on through me when I would have stressed and analyzed it for days or even weeks before the self-love flowed in.
My dearest friend in Colorado and I also had a bout of this weird, old, nasty female competitive energy that took us a part for many months. This one was on me, completely. I accused her of all sorts of things, which were really my own. After a long break and apologies she so masterly said were not needed, we too have moved passed it.
Master M who seems to care less whether I have friends or not, jumps for joy when I am going to meet her for a walk. He says, "(Her Name), yay, I can't wait to hear what she has to say!"
He says she is like Kuthumi was to him in his last life - a trusted friend and a true master without the bullshit who will tell you directly to your face, what you need to hear even when you don't want to hear it. These words may seem harsh but you can tell they come from a space of deep honor for you not out of jealousy or competition.
Those are the type of friends you will have in divine will. They will not care who you were, but who you have become.
Sar'h says it is like any growth - there is always a death, before the rebirth. Don't forget to water the soil of SELF and have patience for the beautiful bloom sure to grow - one worthy of your company.
I could say so much more about the history of women on this planet, the old competition for the man in the village, and more. Yet, it's an old story, one that is best told through silence.
In appreciation for all of you, no longer the lobsters needing to claw our way to the surface of the water tank, for we already exist in the freedom outside of the tank.
Big love. Big life.