This morning I was pleasantly gifted with an article by Joanna to share with you all. It's probably no secret that I feel a - I would say strong connection, but more its just an open channel of non-verbal communication. I have wondered since she and Xanthe joined us here and changed the dynamic in such a grand way how I knew her. Today I got the answer reading this. I know her from the future now. Two lifelines, or two beings, rather, going in seemingly opposite linear time and meeting in a point of consciousness. Enjoy! - Lauren
I drew this image with oil pastels last year. It was completely intuitive and it just appeared from random strokes. I had almost forgotten about it until I wrote this article. - Joanna
The Consciousness Engineer and New Being
It’s an overcast day, but warm… just warm enough to be comfortable and it’s decently windy. The birds are noisy today, so are the bird bombs (noise makers to keep birds from the cherries) from the field next to us. I overlook mountains, an alfalfa field, my garden and can hear the traffic in the background from the Okanagan Highway. I sit under an old, messy elm tree. One that dropped a substantial branch of itself on our deck last night.
A ladybug has landed on my sandal. I noticed last year and this, that they have changed colour around here. I used to only see the dark red associated with ladybugs. Now they are a beautiful yellow orange and I haven’t seen a red one in a long time.
I’m viewing my human situation on one level. It’s wacky and certainly not ‘masterly’ from…. ahem…certain points of view. I’m viewing my partner leaving his totally entangled family, after the death of his Father, and all the ugliness that entails. Here I sit smack dab in the middle of it, and have engaged in it, living on co-owned land with them, and wonder how I ended up being here! There’s an interesting view in all of it.. but that’s another story.
On another level I explore the vastness of who I AM once again. “Who” doesn’t seem to encompass it. It doesn’t compute. All I’m left to do here is feel. I have gone in and out of my multi-dimensional self, and I have had the names of some facets and have somewhat felt a story or two. And yet now it’s changed again, and it’s settling, and it’s completely different than what I have experience before as the ‘and’, as the human having the supremely joyful, honeymoon, embodied realization experience, and as what I have felt myself to be in multi-dimensional totality from this human plane.
Because, what I’m most engaged in, in the middle of all this, is the creation of the new. I explore what it is to be a new being. Not only a new human… but a new being, and speaking of beyond Earth, well, this is a little harder to translate. Without past, story, anything as we’ve touched on here in this space. We’ve created stories far far beyond and before earth. This was our creation from a different awareness. These stories are being and have been, erased as they existed on their own. Either distilled or erased. It’s like the “I brought you into this world, I can take you out!” Many would argue with me here, and this is for specific situations, but it’s worked for me. Then there is a thunk now….exactly as I wrote that, a bird dropped a cherry pit right beside me. Amusing. Seems we planted a seed.
And there is the NEW element, that we have spoken about. It has been here with me for some time but I couldn’t quite settle it…or rather two new elements on Earth and the first sounds like this:
I have never been here before.
It was funny because before, from a human time standpoint, I knew I was here many times, but I remembered nothing in particular. I knew there was a story there, but I ‘remembered’ nothing. Then a few years ago, it occurred to me I wasn’t here that often and heard something like ‘three times’. Slowly that idea dwindled away. And then again:
I have never been here before.
It’s like I’m viewing people and thinking, what is this about?! I’m viewing and thinking ‘why isn’t this familiar’ and also, at the same time, not surprised. An interesting place to be. Yes, I spoke from this space in my video, that feels like yesterday, but apparently was a while ago! But that aside….
The creation of consciousness and the creation of my own being is what I consider to be the epitome of creation in my world. I spend much time here. I explore here. I create here. (Many years ago, my friend called me ‘A consciousness engineer’.) I feel what it means to be in this absolutely pristine and untouched space of self with the second new element…clean consciousness. I do not feel a triad of beingness as master, I AM and human. Not even remotely…although I once felt different layers somewhat like that. And now, that feeling of WE within the I AM feels different. WE no longer computes as it once did.
A while back, there was a short period of, hm, an interest a couple of years ago, deep deep in the arms of creator, feminine, me, whatever you want to call it. Within that, I wondered, why don’t I remember anything? I hadn’t actually questioned it before, so then it just became common place that I didn’t. And then, from others, I heard particular names of who I am ‘also’ and I played in those ideas for some time, and on some levels it’s all true, in terms of getting to know and integrating the different realms of self from the human perspective. Of course much also came from myself and my explorations. Yet quite annoyingly, in the expansiveness of feeling that at first, I eventually felt the limitations in those names I was given. I felt the expectations in those names….from all over creation.
But the truth NOW, is that NONE of those names are fitting.
And as I feel now, my original has been re-born and I am experiencing this birth. I’ve known this for a while, but really feeling it now. The meld is occurring on the human level to a greater degree. While I am still multi-dimensional, the multiplicity has (somewhat) disappeared for me. As I adjust to this, it can almost feel as if ‘it’ went away. But there is a different depth here now, sitting in this human space, in this (a bird I’ve never seen before just landed in my garden) melded space. The word expansive doesn’t work here as it once did. Will I create new ‘ands’? I dunno. Is this just a phase? I dunno. ha! ‘It is and it isn’t’ I hear.
There’s not much more than clean consciousness and me. Having no name seems to be much more true. Can what I AM NOW be encompassed in a name? I’m exploring what’s possible now. How the clean consciousness affects things. How the implant integration has changed things in the physical and how I feel. (This story is 1/3 done, honest!) I’m exploring the ‘multiplicity’ vs the ‘meld’ now and what that means.
It’s a bit of a sleepy, hazy place today, but it’s warm and kinda cushiony for now.
And in re-reading and tweaking this, the image occurs to me.. that I fell backwards into the multiplicity, it came in on itself and it seems to have melded into one and from that came the birthing again of I AM. I wrote a couple years ago when I started to feel this ‘and you will know yourself again as original’. And I move now, as with many things, from the knowing and sitting in different dimensional spaces, into the embodiment of.
I wrote this yesterday and let it rest for the night. Came back to re-read once again, and then came across the comment from Xavi under Lauren’s I Am Creation article, that I hadn’t heard before he wrote it. From Adamus: "Once Ascended you will find yourself back in the Wall of Fire, only it will not burn you anymore, and you will discover that you have never moved from there.” (From the Altar Book Four preview)
And here we go again!
A note from Lauren: Joanna, this picture is striking for many reasons but going back to the future now it looks like my visit to the Sequoia National Forest, which has occurred but not in linear time. While in Poland, on a very hot day (Raphaelle, it is hot as balls in Europe!) on June First, El Morya appeared to me in physical form. The last time was in September when he introduced the Banyan Tree to me and well, you know what happens next.
So when I got home I went to look for a camping spot in the national forest which only opens on June 20th. It is usually booked out six months in advance but there it was - the single camping spot I reserved so easily. So I'm going to go find out what already happened....stay tuned...
Thank you, Joanna, and Xanthe for always taking my writing to the next level. I write something or just "think" it and there you are pushing it ever so gently into a deeper consciousness. Others might be annoyed. I am overjoyed to be pushed to go further and I thank you both.
Also, I have felt the WE dissolve into the I. No longer feeling any attachment to a Sar'h voice or past lives, I seem to be swimming in the future now. What a party!