The Dream that Inspired the Series
The other night - I'm not sure when it was as I am not sure where I am or what day it is - I had a dream so real I could not shake it. Unable to sleep, I was out in my living room and started up the fireplace as to not disturb my partner, D, who was sleeping in his own dream world.
It was one of those half-awake, half-asleep states that I seem to spend hours in each day. In this space, imagination comes to life in images and sensations, linear time does not exist, and gravity certainly does not hold me tethered to Earth.
In the dream, I was back at the space before I first incarnated in human form. I was handed a drug and told I needed to take it to be able to exist in this strange physical world called Earth. I would go crazy without it, I was told.
The pill - the drug - was Maya - the great cosmic illusion we discussed yesterday - and it would narrow my vision so that I could survive in this strange third-deminisional world. That was my understanding in the dream, though, it did not come with words. Oh so limiting these words are!
Always the adventurer, I took it - I took the drug that lowered the veil before my eyes. Yet, there was just one problem. It didn't work. It would wear off so quickly with each incarnation, I had to take more and more of this drug, yet inevitably it would wear off time and time again. Even if I took enough Maya pills for ten men, it would wear off.
Sometimes it would work, though, maybe for a few months. There was a lifetime or two where it worked the whole time until the very end, and then I would leave the physical form almost immediately as soon as it wore off.
Another problem that continued happening with this defective drug is it would wear off at the most inconvenient times. For example, I would take the drug and be born into a new body. The drug rarely worked on me as a child. However, being around others on the drug seemed to kick the effects of Maya back into gear as I became an adult.
As a young adult - under the effects of Maya - I would fall deep in love with another person, or my job, or a religion, or my art, or anything of the like. The object of my obsession changed from lifetime to lifetime.
Then, inevitably, the passions for the person, place, or thing would wear off almost in an instant, and I would find that I was completely unsatisfied with my experience in the maya, in the duality. And then I would return to self, once again, and almost immediately leave the physical body, starting another round of this drug called, Maya, with another name and another physical body.
The dream was in hindsight, so I could see in this soul timeline of sorts that I began to grow tired of this cycle, yet, in the dream, I knew I could not go back home to the ONE. Even if I could, I did not want to go back home to the ONE.
I wanted to experience the ONE for myself. And I had many times, yet like an orgasm I could not hold, it would slip through my fingers like sand, each and every time. I wanted to experience the ONE in an eternal orgasm of Spirit that was mine alone.
Then I met D in the dream - in linear time, it would represent now. He had been there when I first took the drug, Maya, too. I had watched him take the drug as well.
When we ran into each other in the dream, I went up to him and said - with words --
"Thank God, I don't have to take the drugs anymore!
We don't have to take the drugs anymore!"
D just smiled and nodded like he already knew before my aha! moment.
And then the sensation of Maya left me, the blood stream, the body of consciousness for good. I was awake yet not moving and eyes closed as it happened. I breathed a sigh of relief and relaxation as I lay by the warm December fire of my Colorado home.
Many people who seek spiritual experiences take drugs to remove the veil. The most popular in America spiritual communities is the ayahuasca plant. My curiosity once got the better of me and I tried it, only to find it made me feel sober, flat, and without my treasured imagination, which has been my refuge through the cosmic illusion experience.
I have started to feel the same way about led meditations or experiences, especially what are called merabhs by the Crimson Circle. There's no need to take me out of the state of being that is gracing the Universe of Me. In fact, it feels as irritating as the dualistic Maya pills I was once given. I don't need to be hypnotized into believing I am in enlightenment. I simply AM. A merabh for abundance or ahmyo or anything else is no different than the spiritual affirmation variety. Lack begets lack no matter the sophistication of the "drug" shared.
Perhaps there is no drug, merhaub, super food, fast, or information source that removes the veil?
Instead, what if the Maya is the drug, and what we need is sobriety of the soul - a break from the Samsara -- AND the cycle of SEEKING and RECEIVING over and over and over again.
I don't have much more to say than this dream, which is not captured by words adequately, but perhaps in part by my painting above, inspired the series that will kick off 2018. It shall be interesting for me to see how that shakes out.
Next, I will talk about the physical changes the body goes through in the Triple E and the dynamics of perceived sickness as it moves through the physical vessel expression of the I AM.