I wanted to share with all of you the full preview of a short book I self published through Blurb in April of 2010 called “Becoming: The Discovery of You”. One of the issues of the printed version that I discovered is that the printing of photos in a book is so much more costly than a regular printed word book. So I put the book on full preview for folks to read in digital format.
Here is the link to the preview. Click on the word preview. http://www.blurb.ca/b/1289380-becoming
Karen, I love this book. Thank you!
And I just realized that I wrote and published this a few months before my big breakdown! (Note: On our call about writing, both Bogdan and Kim shared when they wrote things often fell apart. For example, Kim said she wanted to write about relationships and they all started to fall apart. I too have experienced that, and I see the wisdom in it so clearly.)
Bogdan, your comments about writing something and then having life fall apart happened to me! I often wondered how I could have written this book and then crash and fall apart to such an extent! So thanks for sharing that, I see I am not alone.
Karen, do you feel you wrote the book for you in your darkest before the dawn days? And for others who might find themselves in the same situation? I sense it as a pure soul expression as well. In gratitude, Lauren
The following are notes from Karen's blog which can be found on Ryver under Topics. It's just one of the many example of the magic that is happening on Ryver right now - the expression of our Banyan Tree creation.
Thank you, Karen, for sharing the grandness in your vulnerability and willingness to share about your "breakdown". I'm sure each and every one of us has experienced a break down. For what is a break down but a giant release/ integration of what no longer serves us in our "last" lifetime AND a fuller experience of becoming. Being = the perpetual state of becoming. For there is no end and no beginning in realization.
Excerpt from Karen's Blog....
Well...it seems as though I am doing some sort of final "clearing" of this experience. And, somewhere in there is a desire to understand some of that "reason".
Last night I was reviewing a few of the readings I got during and shortly after that time, and one I had forgotten about was from Raphael through my friend Jeane (also on the website). And in that one Raphael said:
"These aspects that brought about the experience of your spiritual breakdown are, in a linear sense of speaking, the oldest that you have and will ever have. They are from your experiences in the Wall of Fire and in the Void. They are from that first fracturing of your sense of self and identity that was broken into an infinite number of pieces and felt to be lost for all time. The Wall of Fire experience is the single most horrific experience that your soul has ever had!"
And that helped me understand the intensity of the experience. Another reading from my friend Susan said that these aspects had been trying to find Self Love in many different places and were now all coming home in a crowd, and I collapsed under that.
In any case, I am starting to understand that perhaps at a Soul level I was attempting to move through some of the most difficult of aspect integration and the human just collapsed.
But Soul said, "We are not done with this lifetime yet", and onward we moved.
Now seven years and much healing and evolution later, I am clearing any residual stuff out of the body and emotional fields. And maybe it is part of what Adamus talked about in this last Shoud, that the human is off getting a tune up in preparation for integration.
I think that part of the reason I chose to have this crazy experience is that I had this desire to move forward as quickly as I could, and I remember I kept saying, "Let's go for it, whatever it takes".
After this experience it was more like, "Let's do this with ease and grace". The reading from Jeane also said that my experiences were recorded in the library of the New Earth, so hopefully some wisdom is there and others may choose to have a gentler experience!
Indeed, I have been harping a bit on writing a story down, yet I remain in the sense of understanding that my soul once said to me.
"Everytime you have a realization of any scope and breadth, you open up a potential for another to do the same. No need to convince, no need to teach, no need to sell, you have opened the door for those choosing consciousness (over automation for eons to come). And that wisdom is stored within the writing on the wall of the invisible library, whether you physical write it down or not.
When you share your story in the physical form (video, word, art, music, etc...)it does many things. First, it clears a pathway for you to BECOME more YOU. The expression is by you and for you, alone. And, the written word or other physical expression may help a human facet come into a greater awareness of the soul experience, know they are not alone, and they are not going crazy.
The written word or other physical expression will open a door, which was never really a door but a potential to choose from a sovereign state of being.
Not in print or physical form your experience lives on - and El Morya can speak to this too as he has consciously limited what parts of his story to share - the realization you realized, the becoming more of who you are, connected to wisdom and your own unique I AM-ness - also gets recorded into the 'invisible library.'
When you expand for you and you alone, the potentials and possibilities become higher probabilities for those choosing the consciousness, that is ending the reincarnation cycle among many of other experiences...."
Hey, sovereign beings. I am so behind on this. I have really wanted to highlight some of the stories you all have shared on Ryver and with me personally. Michael wrote a song, Deneen has a dream, Karen shared her grandness through vulnerability, Xanthe graced us with her grace. To start the series off, here's a grand tale from Xavi, who recently met up with another Center of Being soul, Letizia, in France. I quite loved the story, and I sense you will appreciate it too. If you have a story to share, please send me pictures along with it. You can put it in any form you would like, but it saves me so much energy if you create titles and formatting suggestions like Xavi did. ENJOY!
"I thoroughly enjoyed laughing with the writer as he clung onto life by a thin thread. Nothing like a near death experience to thaw your cold, cold heart" - Cheeky Critic Review
The Matcha Chronicles of a Macho Man
I was driving peacefully back to my town when I realized how relaxed I felt after the trip and how my energy had changed since the beginning.
Letizia invited me to spend a few days at the Super Green France Mountains to share good food that she cooks, good conversation with a good wine, eight cats in the house and the hikes around.
The last day of the hike I was climbing a mountain to waterfalls formed by the spring thaw. According to the signs, it was a five-hour trip. On the way she stopped a lot to rest and admire the landscape barely without dealing with words. So I waited. This dynamic of stopping every few meters occurred throughout the ascent.
The trip was getting slow and heavy for me. I had not realized it yet, but I had lost sight of the meaning of it all. I had become obsessed with reaching the top, at any price and as quickly as possible. Hmmm, do I sense a metaphor here?;)
She stopped once more, so I waited for her sitting on a large rock a few meters above. I could observe a movement by my peripheral vision. She was moving, only on that occasion if I did not see her pass, I would not know she was ahead of me.
This was when my male anger began to manifest itself more. I had been pitifully climbing the whole way carrying my poor tired body and without strength, using perhaps too strongly, my walking stick. Every step I took, I rammed my rod harder and harder into the rock-strewn ground.
After that she stopped again, and as it seemed to me that the waterfall was close I decided to go ahead and not wait for her anymore.
I arrived at a detour where I could go down to the lowest part of the waterfall. The water was raging and I still felt the call of adventure. "She sure would," I thought, so I skipped a couple of rocks to get in the middle of the river and take a good picture of the waterfall in front of me. See above picture...
It was then that I looked back when I realized how dangerous it was. A false step, a slip, and I would have fallen down the river by a descent slope full of rocks ready to crush me.
I started to turn around and it was here that common sense prevailed: "If I go back by the same rocks that I came and I slip, adios, I'm dead." So I jumped to a rock that was to my left and ... said and done I slipped.
I fell like a sack of potatoes in the icy waters of the thaw, only to save me from death because I changed the place to return at the last second. Suddenly I was soaked to the bone. I went back to where she was, I told her what happened. I warned her that there was still a long way to go, and I warned her how dangerous it was to go where I was because of how slippery it was.
She told me: "Oh do not worry, I'm fine, I do not need to climb to the top".
This is when I understood it. It is not about the destination, but about the trip.
She has been enjoying the whole ascension trip without even worrying about whether it would end or not. It did not matter. Only the experience mattered. And it was a great and beautiful experience for her to connect with Mother Nature in her wildest and purest state.
Later I had thought about taking my clothes off a rock and drying it, but as if the mountain did not want me there, it started to rain and the feeling of cold began to increase. I decided that I would go down the mountain in a hurry to warm up and dry myself in the car.
So the fuel of anger carried me back down in a sigh. I took off my boots, put on the heater and relaxed to wait lying in the backseat of my car.
Once a Master said that Mother Earth could be ruthless, and just as my energy was in the ascent I was not very in tune with her. With each new step I took, my anger increased, because of the hardness of the trip. Now seeing the experience in perspective, all the merciless thing that she did with me was to throw myself to the safe side of the cold waters. And believe me, there is nothing like a romp of cold water to conquer the coldness in life.
The next morning was the time to go back to my city. She told me that she had noticed a change in the energy of the house and now the eight cats felt relaxed without fighting each other.
A part of my angry masculine energy stayed in the icy waters of the thaw.
Au revoir France. I'm returning a little better than I arrived.
Part 2: The Matcha Man Anecdote
Matcha Tea is a type of Japanese Green Tea powder that I had taken for my trip and that I usually drink every day.
One day before I was climbing another mountain. Here the snow had not melted yet. The idea was to reach a lake in the upper part of the mountain. It had become an impossible climb since because of the snow, the ascent was very slippery. We took another safer path and climbed into a forest.
There she began to dance and sing in the middle of the mountain with a Madonna song that played on the speakers of her mobile phone. You could not see anyone else for miles around. While she expressed herself I stayed, uncomfortable, looking at the horizon, waiting, for the dance of feminine life to end.
This is the anecdote of the macho man. The macho man does not dance to express the joy of being alive. The macho man is an almost inexpressive male.
When we came back later that day, in the kitchen she bothered me with what happened. With my phone, I played the song Village People Macho Man and started singing it.
"See, this song I can dance and sing on the mountain," I said.
She replied laughing: "You are a Macho Man ... no, a Matcha Man, and every time you listen to this song you will remember it".
And we both laughed.
Enlightenment is what happens naturally when you are living your life - Sar'h
Kim experienced her own thirty days of self love recently and received too much wisdom to put in a single article. Instead, she wrote a poem for us here and for the Banyan Tree publication. My favorite writings by Yogananda are his "Songs of the Soul" poems. For me a poem is a beautiful way to express without going linear or mental, and I simply love this. Thank you, Kim, for gift to us. I am right there with you in the conscious waves of this poem. A breath of fresh, free air in this dense, dense world.
Love Letter from Soul
By Kim Seppala
Sail the seas and discover new lands,
trail the pathless woods and slide
slippery slopes through the dusk.
Fly the skies and dive the depths,
find treasures of gold and dust
on your way, but listen when I say:
Sometimes, the wildest adventures
are the ones closest to home, found
in the timeless space deep within.
Travel the landscapes of life,
trace the contours of contrast,
for I will never hold you back.
And when you’ve seen everything
there is to see, perhaps you’ll see
me too, standing here
waiting for you, my human,
- my heart-shaped souvenir
from this wild ride called Life;
waiting for the one brave enough to
Love. Love: an all-encompassing place
of lifted veils and unfiltered rays;
Love, a space-less place of
Oneness, but one with
infinite facets of multiplicity.
I'll be here, waiting for the one
who taught me to Love, waiting
at the end of time, at the edge of space.
I am here.