READER REQUESTS CONTINUED...
There are several questions that have come up from multiple masters of SELF.
When I sense into the energy behind the questions, they seem related, but not so much on a mental level. Don't know how I am going to piece this together, but Master M confirmed my intuition these are all strands from the same thread, so why not try?
Below are the questions. I'm going to take a stab at it with Master M. Please feel free to add your wisdom below. I am genuinely curious.
From one reader:
"Something has been with me lately. It is about the parallel realities that we live constantly. In the past I used to enjoy those dreams about the other realities, but lately when I dream about it, it brings me a sense of dissatisfaction and discomfort to my current reality."
From another reader:
"What does playing with the energies from divine perspective look like?"
"How is everyone experiencing multi-dimensionality from the space of Divine Will?"
- I hope to hear from you masters on this one. -
Let's just say things have taken a strange twist over here in the multi-reality department. The other night I was sleeping and awake. I looked over at D to see if he was awake, and I saw him sleeping (physical body) and also sitting up listening to his headphones (also an image clear as day but I could tell it was not his actual body made of matter).
Last night D had a dream in which we were watching a movie - a horror film - on his laptop. Then we were in the horror movie. A movie that was Hollywood worthy, according to D. He woke up, and then right back into the movie. He says he wasn't scared because he knew it was a movie - a high-definition blockbuster at that.
Like the first reader question/ comment, I too used to revel in the experience of multiple realities. It's so very cool to learn about parallel story lines and simultaneous lives. Then something shifted recently for me as well.
About three days ago, I was laying in bed in a deep state of relaxed ONEness with my soul. When I came back into human form, I was so irritated. It felt so limited and fragmented. I didn't want to scream, but everything physical felt like the irritation of sandpaper on my skin. A low grade irritation - one that is so dull it is extra irritating.
Perhaps when we are so expanded and then we have to stuff all that energy back into physicality, we experience the magnitude of existence only to come back into the dull 3-D world. That's nothing new to us, but hang with me for a few paragraphs.
I have a sneaking soul suspicion that this is part of the motion into the third circle, or transfiguration (cellular shift) from Free Will to Divine Will. We are bringing the expansion of the soul's will into human form - embodied enlightenment.
For a human metaphor, that's a whole lot of consciousness to stuff into one body. We are embodying God within our physical bodies. Of course, that is not going to be pleasant every minute of the day.
Might explain my bloating and weight gain - surely it's not all those cakes I have been eating:P
Let me try this another way...In human free will, those simultaneous lives and multiple realities also had free will, right?
The role of SELF in that reality could do whatever it wanted.
In Divine Will, or Soul Will, I mentioned before it feels like my soul is a flowing river headed in one direction (obviously not - but for the sake of human writing). Those parallel story lines are not in the flow of my soul's will, which has taken the driver's seat.
Like a ship turning in the sea to go with the tides of your transfiguring consciousness, it is going to take some time for those story lines to be in the flow.
It's not that those parallel realities and simultaneously lives go away, although they are/ or become integrated into our ONEness. And I "think" our awareness of them continues to expand until we become so comfortable with our multiplicity that it is no longer that annoying fly buzzing around us.
I'm not sure how to say it, the story lines continue to exist but the human will in the story lines seems to also transfigure into soul will. Thus, not only this human life must make the shift into Divine Will; all your lives and realities are making the shift, simultaneously, too. Holy crap!
Master M says this is something that must be sensed and not mentally understood, but that the parables might help bring the human along. He also reminds me of the 'science.' When you move from free will into being a vessel for the will of God (self), you are undergoing such a radical shift at the cellular level, it is no surprise that you might be irritated, tired and then wired, starving and then stuffed.
He says if your human wants to know what to do, he recommends avoiding making big decisions, any kind of external commitments, and instead dedicating yourself to doing nothing - BEING and BREATHING.
He says in this transfiguration what you think you want to create will change drastically, and any creation requiring effort is a huge waste of energy that might be better directed to this deep, cellular shift going on inside of you.
Master M says we've had the glimpses of what lies on "the other side," and the experiences in remembering patience "pays off."
For example, we were trying to figuratively create $100 when $1 million was just around the corner - if we were patient, if we did not settle simply to curb our human discomfort of the unknown.
Or when we were trying to find shelter in any place available when there was an empty mansion waiting for us half a mile down the street. Yet, we took the tent just in case there was not a better option down the road.
Master M is saying don't dive after the $100 bill, especially one that a dozen other people are trying to grab at. Don't stop and sleep in the tent. Walk on into Divine Will - let the others have the experience fighting over the only tent left as you kick your feet up in the mansion down the road.
BREATHE and BE your way into the infinite riches of DIVINE WILL.
The more human discomfort of the unknown you can allow to flow through you (because you have the deep knowing of what riches await you), the "better off" you will be.
Damn, Master M, thank you!
As far as playing with energies, I sense a shift in that experience too. I do not know yet how playing with energies appears in Divine Will, yet I have a deep knowing it is vastly different than how we played in Free Will.
Master M says many of you either stopped playing with others in their Free Will experiences and games a while back. Others like me, he said, have just felt the deep soul message that it is time to leave those worlds, not knowing at the human level what is next, but knowing deeply in our soul space, that what's "ahead" is infinitely more "interesting" and "rewarding."
I use quotes so much because words are so damn limiting to the energy that he is using. I wish I could type in light. Perhaps you see the golden rays, too.
I sense this is enough for today, but I will continue and continue on this topic for many posts. Please share. I would love to hear from you all. Your questions are super helpful, too.
Also, thank you for this FREE space to share unfiltered. None of this is ever edited and is "real time" - a beautiful breath of fresh, conscious air for me. Infinite gratitude. It is PURE JOY!
I received the following reader request. It has been slightly edited for brevity and anonymity...
"I was reading a thread in a post where you wrote that you choose to never dim your light in any setting."
(For context, I wrote on a Facebook thread I was once told true humility was never dimming your light to fit into any given situation.)
I got a bit confused I must admit, I was guided to dim myself in places I go that is pretty dark, which can be as a self-protection mechanism as to not be attacked.
I am of course taking this up with my own soul master self (Right on!), but I am curious because I don't want to create any attacks, and I know if that's the reason I will get attacked.
I also know that by shining my light I cannot be attacked everything just go into distillation as the light is the I exist.
But I also know that people get scared of this light. I also remember that Adamus said that people who get scared of it are running away, and YES they do. Others stick around because they are drawn to it from their inside.
Is it possible to ask you to write a post about your view on this?"
Yes! This is a topic that has plagued me for many years and many lifetimes. I, like many of you, have often felt too big, so I shrunk myself as to not cause a stir. I also felt punished for being so big (or expanded) when I finally had the courage to BE my big self.
It seems to me also that this phenomena is magnified online. It seems, especially lately, that in online forums, people tend to be more vocal and aggressive than they would be in face to face contact.
After publishing my book and being my BIG SELF online, I lost friends. I lost many friends. Their actions seemed to say, "How dare she shine?!" and I took it personal.
The thing is nothing - absolutely nothing is personal. Anytime someone is triggered, it is showing them places within their body of consciousness, within their Universe of Self, where they can expand. It creates a crack for the light to come into the unexplored parts of themselves.
When we are triggered by someone's aggression or retreat (retreat is also a trigger response), it is showing us the tight places that call for expansion within us as well.
In this context, any "explosion" or collision of our body of consciousness with any one else can be viewed as a huge gift. It is the gift of awareness. The gift of knowing where we can expand even further into the GRANDness of who we are.
I am finding when we allow the action and reaction energy expenditures they return to neutral energy quite quickly. In opposition, when we try to suppress or control actions and reactions ("I am not supposed to react."), they become magnified.
It comes back to the sense of focus. For example, when I first published my book and started this Patreon page, I found when people responded to what I wrote, it was so important to me, in my little world. Positive or negative feedback - it didn't matter - the reactions were hugely important.
Then as I softened my sense of focus, my view expanded, my multiplicity returned. Someone's reaction to my book (nothing but a small act of consciousness), I found instead of a tidal wave the reaction felt like nothing more than a ripple in my body of consciousness.
For me now, the tidal waves were a huge gift - the best gifts - as they opened up pockets of awareness within me, ones I had not seen for years or lifetimes.
If you are on this page, you already know discomfort is an awesome experience because it means we are expanding. It's the caterpillar becoming the butterfly - the snake shedding its skin. The discomfort is necessary in the transfiguration.
So my response is always be your BIG SELF. No longer in fear of the reaction - with the expanded awareness - with the softer focus, any triggers are like beautiful packages to unwrap from our soul.
"Soul, what is this uncomfortable experience showing me? What wisdom can I distill from it?"
Being "out there" is scary. We have been programmed for hundreds if not thousands of lifetimes to shut up and blend in. In this last lifetime, or one of the last, in human form, you don't want to look back and see that you did not live your full self life for the sake of not "hurting" someone's feelings.
Every time my "feeling were hurt" I did not allow it to harden me. Instead, I became softer, more aware of all the facets of my BEING-ness. Although I was probably crying big crocodile tears through it, as I am an avid crier.
Now when someone criticizes me or leaves this Patreon page with a huff and a puff (rare but it happens), it is but a mere ripple in the ocean of ME.
On the other side of the coin, praise is deeply honored and appreciated - immensely honored and appreciated - yet it too is also a ripple, rather than a tidal wave.
My human no longer needs to derive energy from the approval or disapproval of others.
Many, many human derive energy from being pissed off, from the disapproval. Then they can shout about being the victim. It's an effective human way to get some momentum going in their human world. I know from vast experience:)
"I cannot believe so and so did such and such..." - Such a worn out story for me, yet I was pulled into it a few short months ago.
Praise is an even more seductive mechanism of deriving energy externally because it also feeds the human ego. I would say there is nothing wrong or right about it, only that staying within the space where everyone agrees with you is not always super supportive of us learning, or remembering rather, to create energy from within.
For me, both are still occurring. I am still deriving energy externally and internally, although I feel the external energy sources slipping through my fingers like sand on a beach.
That's why I talk so much about cigarettes, beer and food - they represent this shift from external fulfillment to internal. It's just an example from my personal life. Something for the human to comprehend...
Additionally, we can always go back to the art of discernment - what serves and does not serve us in any given moment and understanding it changes in any given moment and any given reality.
For example, being in a critical, aggressive community taught me so much about myself. Now, I don't need to have that experience. The light came in through the cracks already. I am so glad I had the experience.
Furthermore, my sharings and offerings to this world are no longer a choice. There are no longer the questions... "Should I share or not share? What will people think? Is it safe?"
Yet, there is discernment in how to share. I am learning I can radiate without having to put a sign on myself that says, "Hey look! I am radiating!" And I can have a god laugh about when I did that. Why not laugh?! It all served. Every ridiculous human act served me and continues to serve me. Humor is optional, but sure helps.
Back to the point...Now my soul offerings flow from soul unfiltered, and the reactions of others are none of my business.
I would have to shrink myself into the dualistic world to care, and it's too energetically expensive. My human recently tried and gave up! My human finally realized it can longer paddle up the stream of SELF. It doesn't want to anymore.
To the person who wrote this (and to myself):
You know deeply (soul-level gnost) that it is no longer a choice to share your soul self. In BEING, you cannot, or will not, dim your shine for any situation. You simple ARE - YOU EXIST in all your radiance and grandness.
Your human, like mine and many of ours, is simply catching up to this way of BEING. We can resist, or we can breathe and allow the discomfort to flow through undiluted and with honor for the wisdom is distills.
That truly is the MAGIC of BEING.
In magic there is no dark and light. Magic is neutral and lives outside of gravity and duality. And as soon as we learn how simple it all is, even the magic of the experience distills into wisdom.
For me, I'm savoring the unraveling of the mysteries of the Magic of Being, before they too dissolve into the source from which they came - the wisdom of God (SELF) - and are no longer a mystery but an "Of Course!"
What's going on with you SHINY, SHINY souls?
Finally catching up on reader requests. Please note the last post sent too early from my phone. It has been updated, so you'll need to read it on the website. Thanks for your patience!
One patron recently asked about being open to a romantic relationship after many years of being alone and how it looks in the Triple E.
That is something I feel I can share. However, I'd be the last person to talk to about long-term, making things work, or sticking it out in relationships.
I will also say I've attempted human relationships and that was absolutely impossible for me. I can't play "human" and can't hardly talk human anymore.
Being alone was my natural state of being even in my human life. I only had one serious boyfriend from age 25-28. I was married to him from 28-32. I swore I'd never do it again. And I meant it.
Since my divorce and going through these major shifts, I attempted to stay open to relationships but nothing lasted more than a night or a few weeks.
I will say the "romantic" experiences did at least scratch an itch and at best, I learned a lot about myself and my patterns from each one.
And, then it became too energetically expensive, too much of a distraction, and I declared myself done.
That's right when it happened - when D showed up (and another wonderful person and I ended up having to pick, yet there was never a choice...).
In my life movie screen, it seems about four months ago, I pretty much woke up with a companion while walking the Camino de Santiago.
We met at a Crimson Circle workshop in May 2016 and talked through text every now and then. Something shifted on the walk.
The words I would use: deep understanding at the cellular level, respect of one master to another. He saw me for who I really am. I see him beyond any layers, only core.
Of course, four months into this does not make me an expert, but here's what I have learned about myself in the context of a "new energy relationship" - I put that in quotes because the only "real" new energy relationship is with SELF - no one else.
*All my personal, unique soul experiences- never advice, never criticism- Please share your experiences below*
For me, I will not be in any relationship (friendship, business, romantic) that requires hard work. Just like in any creative expression, hard work is a signal for me to turn around, to re-route.
So many people love to talk about how hard their marriage or whatever was and how they made it through it. That has never resonated with me, although I honor the experience without understanding it.
This relationship is really easy. The only minor hiccups have been sharing living space with other people who were integrating, so I have decided I won't do that anymore. I need my own space, and the only person I can share it with right now is D.
After living alone for all but seven years of my life - I did not even have college roommates- people usually bug the crap out of me. It's beyond explanation how I am never annoyed with him.
But it's new, you might say, it will get hard. So what?
If it's hard, neither of us can or will do it. Neither of us is capable of force or fight anymore. Again, I can only be in a relationship of any kind that requires no effort.
Soul expressions of honor, compassion, and love require no effort at all in any kind of relationship.
Next, the only kind of commitment that exists for me is to my self-realization. I'm not interested in other men, only in putting me first.
To be with someone who does the same, holds self-realization at the highest priority, is the only way for me to be able to have this experience.
I cannot have a partner who is not self-sufficient and self-aware. I tried too many times to be with a human- at the expense of my own health and wellbeing.
On a practical level, I do not have typical manly man experience - D is not going to defend me (he literally contains no force).
He is not going to give me accolades publicly, like on Facebook, or serve as a cheerleader.
My ex husband did these things, and they all came with a cost and a big fat story. Thank goodness we don't have to repeat the Adam/ Isis roles.
D knows that there's nothing to defend, that accolades feel cheap to me, and that the resonance from his Being is way better than any words shared.
We also split the costs of everything and take turns with human tasks. So helpful. Whoever is grounded enough and who's brain works enough, gives it a go. 😜
I don't have any words of wisdom here except if someone shows up in your life that causes a spark in your soul, why not explore it with expanded awareness?
If you still enjoy sex, do it as much as possible before the desire to do it goes away like other human pleasures have.
Furthermore - to the person who asked and maybe others - you have learned so much about yourself these past years alone. You know how energy works. You know what you will or will not tolerate. You are too soul intelligent to be bamboozled by the swaggering karmic driveby that once could have wrecked your life. It's not going to happen. You are simply too YOU!!!
Also. I will share my deep inner knowing. Relationships for me will never be life long. I transfigure too quickly and won't bend and certainly won't break for anyone else.
When I sat in the initiation with Master M in 2013 and he asked if I wanted to be a vessel for the Will of God, I knew it meant giving up anything and everything in the human world that kept me from it.
As long as we are both evolving, as long as it's easy, I will stay and enjoy it. When it comes time to part it will be in honor, after that I'm going to spend a good long while by myself.
In the meantime, making love is exquisite. As long as it feels that way, I'm in.
If you feel called to, please share your "new energy relationship" take for your fellow friends curious about diving back in...
Today I also wanted to talk about a symptom of the Triple E or moving into the Third Circle - the seduction/ temptation of human plans.
About a week ago, D and I shared - we don't talk seriously so much because we are both going through our own transfiguration - what was going on in our inner worlds.
Seems our humans were both trying to make plans. What does life look like after our trip? What is home? What will we do? We think of these things as individuals, not as a couple...but the sentiment is the same - the human desperately trying to hold onto free will. The human desperately trying to plan for linear future when there is no linear future.
Even though all of us here know there is no human plan but rather a divine unfolding of our self-realization experience.
The funny thing is you don't even have to follow through with the plans for the human to be happy. It is satisfied as long as its spending your energy on the plans, on the how, on a non-existent linear future...
Back to choices. I believe in awakening and up to a point in enlightenment, choice is very important. Adamus said at the Magic of Merlin in 2016 choice was a master's sense. As aspects come into our periphery, we must discern what voices we are hearing and choose what voice we will follow.
Also, our human experiences are a choice. For example, I know someone clearly in the Triple E choosing to get married, another choosing to have a job and have that experience. Clearly a choice of human experience as the Triple E is not riding on what we do or do not do.
Then at some point, I sense we are simply so surrendered to the divine will, the will of the God self, that there is no choice left, simply an unfolding of realization, which already exists, which we have already "done."
The question is does human choice continue in this state? I do not know "for sure" yet but right now it feels very NO for me. *Subject to the changing tides of my consciousness.
It seems, for me right now, there is not even a "master self" in charge but a flowing river of Self that pulls everything else along with it. The aspect representations of human will are too tired to paddle up stream any longer.
In physics, it would be called the tipping point, in which I was knocked out of one system and into a new situation or equilibrium. Right now, I'm getting my sea legs back. I chose this picture because it represents complete surrender to the now moment. No plans. No goals. No concept of a linear future whatsoever. No more energy to be spent on human aspects paddling up the stream of SELF.
Has your human been trying to seduce you into planning for a non-existent future too?
A few personal notes, using my own space to meander....In the same sentiment of Este's dynamic of postponement post on Facebook, lately I've been mulling to experiences I've had.
It was 2014, I was in deep meditation because at the time it felt good to sit on a cushion in my home yoga studio. I was doing my normal shtick breathing and clearing the mind when a figure appearing as Yeshua showed up and we went in an "astral" journey to a cave in India.
There a man shirtless, levitating in the lotus foot position, appearing to be no more than 25 or 26 greeted me and held my hand. He had long brown hair and sparkling eyes.
Yeshua said without words this was our friend Babaji- never heard of him, I thought. He held my hand for a long time. No words. A blessing maybe?
When I came to, I googled Babaji (I spelled it baba-gi - ha) and it's when I picked up the biography of Yogananda's. Couldn't make sense of any of it. So I did nothing.
The next time I heard from Mahavatar Babaji, it was February ??? 2017. (What day is it??) I was walking with Ollie in deep, snowy woods way up in the mountains. No one around. He showed up glowing and showed me an interactive map of people moving from the awakening to enlightenment experience. There was so much activity in California. Also in Europe. Must be a sign that I should move and teach there. We know how that attempt went. The answer was: do nothing.
Seems in the act of postponement we save a very precious resource- human effort. Energetic discharge to move physical things becomes very expensive. For example, I was trying to open a jammed door the other day and exclaimed, "It's too expensive!" Not money wise, but energy wise.
As I sit in the after effects of my dream this week, especially at the renewed potential for my California space, I sense deeply again- DO NOTHING. Anything else is just too expensive.
In nothing there is everything.
On this trip, we live simple. Sleep. Small breakfast at 10 am. Nap. Surf or walk. Possibly lunch or dinner - not both. Nap. Play cards and sleep sometime between 7 pm and 9 pm. We have no movies or TV and only two books.
I had a moment where I felt like a sloth. My soul then showed me how much had transpired in 2.5 short weeks. Holy hell. No wonder I am doing "nothing" - I AM doing everything.
It's why I can't do big group things, definitely not a seminar or organized event, drink a lot of alcohol, or stay up past 9 pm at the very, very latest. It's too energeticly expensive and a massive distraction from the "everything" going on inside of me. Blessed my partner is in the same space.
The "Dream" of All Dreams
Kim, in such perfect timing, asked me and Master M what the Magic part of the Magic of Being Series is.
About three nights ago I went into a deep sleep. I was building my dream house and the Center of Being gathering space on the shoreline of Encinitas, California - right down the street from Yogananda's Self-Realization Fellowship and my favorite spot in the United States.
It's was an amazing dream as this would be at least a $5-10 million project, not including taxes and so much more.
I was lucid or aware of myself in the dream and was having a grand time creating it. My mom was there and our long passed dog, Loopy. When I was petting the dog, I recall thinking how absolutely real it all was. More real than real! His fur was between my fingers.
Then I started to notice all these relatives and ancestors around and asked my mom why she had brought them all here to my new house when I wanted to be alone. These people were driving me crazy and I felt no tie to my ancestors. Then I walked out of the room full of relatives and into a room facing the beach.
Then a man who I recognized as James, my neighbor in Encinitas, walked past me and said look out the door that goes to the beach, so I did.
It looked like fun- waterslides, surfing, people playing. Everything was real. I touched physically. Heard the sound of children going down the slide. I was fully aware of my body and my home/center creation from nothing with an unlimited budget. I was the human AND the master creator in one.
Then I walked out the door to check out the beach- my new backyard! Still lucid.
Next everything shifted into high definition. This waking physically reality could not even be compared to the most vivid thing I have seen on Earth.
I was walking stone passage ways that seemed ancient and new at the same time. I found everything I touched felt physically real but could mold and shape in anyway I desired. There were statues in the stone walls of the "city" and they were animated and changing and interacting.
Next a large group of people were walking towards me in a relaxed pace. After a dozen passed by, I asked a young man where I was. It was all so new to me. It was so vivid, and I had a strong sense I entered into somewhere I have never been.
"You are in a place of deep relaxation called enlightenment. We are gathering together (those of us enlightened beings for a time)."
He smiled and more passed by me. I stood in awe watching. I could see every detail of each face down to the particles or cells.
Then a short girl/ child came by. While she looked like a child, I knew she was not.
Sensing my question without having to say it, she said, "In my last life, I was a child born with no lungs. I only lived two years and incarnated for a short period of time simply to have my enlightenment."
"That's an interesting choice," I said in honor. Before I could ask out loud why she still appeared as a disabled child while enlightened, she answered my question.
"For this gathering, we are all making our appearance match that of our last human life. It's kind of like sharing our story, but we don't need to talk. Why don't you look around?"
With that, she left. I saw a quiet room, so I thought to observe from there. I felt a bit sleepy so I laid down. Simultaneously, I found I was also sitting on a bench in the study with large windows.
I moved my body with a single desire to do so. I was sleeping and exploring the study, simultaneously.
Next thing I knew I was holding a glass box in my hands. On the box was a constellation alignment. There were gold planets and stars inside a deep, dark blue substance that made up the cosmos, within the walls of the glass.
I wished for a second to take a picture of it to remember and then I decided to memorize the message. I saw it represented a significant human date to come.
Then the words appeared, "Observe: NO," meaning whatever would come to pass was written in the cosmos but no effort was required. Then I saw three 🐢 🐢🐢turtles below.
"Master M!!!" - Kuthumi and Dwal Kuhl too - the three wise men...in another incarnation at the birth of Yeshua.
I was about to go explore more. This place, these masters! It was heaven and more real than my new house and center in California. Holding an object even felt more real.
Then I heard a phone ring. A lady was holding my cell phone, disapprovingly.
"I didn't bring it," I stammered. "I don't know where it came from. I did not bring it with me!"
The woman played the message: "This is Hilde, your mother died."
The woman holding my phone said, "This never happens. I have to take you back. Follow me."
She was moving very quickly as if I had to get out of there as soon as possible.
She flew up a flight of stairs - so I followed also flying - why not - to an empty temple, which was as I soon found out a portal.
I was a bit stunned and confused, but I knew I had to go "back", even though I did not want to at all.
I instinctively knew to cross my legs and simply breathe - I had not been breathing this whole time as it wasn't needed.
Just before I landed back on Earth with a thud in my hotel room in Bali the first master I spoke with from the gathering brought me a plate of desserts.
"Calorie free" he joked telepathically. I had a huge bite of the best whipped cream ever tasted just before I landed on Earth.
I woke up and picked up my phone to text my mom. It was 4:44 am.
Yes, my mom is okay. I really feel I likely would not have come back at all without her texting me in the dream. My mom almost died a couple months ago. I sent her a message too. Get up! (Long story and not mine to tell.)
Seems both of us are supposed to be on Earth right now.
I don't know if it comes across in my account of the dream. This dream to me was the Magic of Being. And creating anything and everything from nothing won't be left to the dream state. Projects without budgets. Gatherings without feeding. Money will be weird paper. Clocks will be featured in a museum of mysteries.
I will write more. It's one thing to talk about the Magic of Being and new energy creation, it's another to physically "do it."
Pay attention to your dreams, masters.
As Penny Lane in the movie 🎥 "Almost Famous" said: IT'S ALL HAPPENING!!!!
Choosing to stay soft in hard worlds is no small task.
As a sensitive being, the world has provided me many opportunities to harden myself in order to stay in it.
Most of the time, I took them.
Antidepressants made me feel less.
Drugs made me feel nothing.
Success made me feel like I had control.
Sarcasm made me feel intelligent and superior.
In this recent exploration of groups, systems, judgements, and discernment, I dove deep into the aspect that wanted to judge myself and judge the people in the groups I belonged to.
I watched and witness myself do it - repeatedly - so I could identify the root and weed it out of my garden of SELF as I no longer wanted to spend energy on such things.
As this judgement aspect came home for integration, I realized it was another false protection mechanism, another human attempt to harden myself so I wouldn't feel and sense so much.
I no longer need to harden.
I can stay soft, safe, and BE me.
If the act of being human is wildly courageous in and of itself, the courage required to attempt self-realization is unmeasurable and indescribable.
Any one who dares to explore it holds my unwavering honor and respect in whatever way they chose it - for themselves.
Today, I chose to stay soft.
I allowed my broken heart to bleed as I watched people tear each other apart in 'supportive' Facebook groups.
I also allowed the courage it takes to stay soft in a world that calls for a thick skin.
I may have shed a few tears as a witness behind a short wall, and not as a participant, but it's a fair trade for remaining open to the beauty of life.
In doing so, I remained open to the energy flowing within me, and my partner's energy. In being and staying open, we had a magical day of laughter and sunshine.
If I had hardened from what I witnessed this morning online, I would have missed the Magic of today. I've had too many stolen moments of joy to allow it any further.The soul whispers, "No more."
I chose to remain soft today. I do not regret it.
Who knows what story I will have tomorrow.
Contagion: The communication of disease by direct or indirect contact.
Thoughts: The formation of (dualistic) opinions, especially as a philosophy or system of ideas, or the opinions so formed.
A short story…
It was 2006. I was a graduate student at the Lyndon B. Johnson School of Public Affairs at the University of Texas. I held a part time job as a lobbyist’s assistant, in which I was learning the ropes for my new career choice.
Even in the soup of mass consciousness, an experience I was enjoying immensely, I could still physically see energy movement and sometimes hear people’s internal thoughts word for word, something that has served me greatly in this life.
I was sitting in South Congress Café, a trendy restaurant that lines South Congress Avenue in Austin, Texas, with three friends – all about to graduate from law school. We were having mimosas and enjoying each other’s company, as there was not much time between study sessions to relax with one another.
At the age of twenty-six we were all coupling. Two of us lived with our boyfriends. Another friends – S – talked about her somewhat new relationship. The last friend was getting married in a few months. It was all an extremely human experience, one I was enjoying.
Sitting across the table from me was my friend getting married and S. As the engaged talked about the wedding details, why she was doing it –the logic behind it, and what she hoped to gain from it, I literally watched a thought pattern come from her head and into S’s head.
Thought patterns, to me, look like clear molecular structures, almost like viewing cultured cells in a petri dish through a microscope like in eighth grade biology class.
Subsequently, in a split second, I saw a light bulb go off in S’s head. I heard her thoughts loud as day, “I’m going to marry my boyfriend. I want that life she is describing.”
S did not say it out loud. She sat silently nodding and sipping her mimosa.
She did go on to marry that boyfriend, and while the marriage has had its problems, I am sure she loves him as much as humanly possible. It was simply the choice for a human experience, and I hold no judgment.
I was simply observing how thoughts move from one vessel to another. It was an education, which serves me with my (former) clients when they find themselves in situations that do not reconcile with their soul’s voice and desires.
Later in my experiences in which I participated in yogic, spiritual, and conscious groups, I have witnessed a million times over the thought contagion spread with my own two physical eyes and my third eye, which remains, sometimes much to my chagrin, wide open. I have witnessed it in myself, too.
The thought or concept launches into space, and looks for an open space to land. Discernment is, at its core, the ability to decipher whether we are choosing to allow the molecular structure of a concept to land and root, or whether we are acting from within. Acting from within rather than in a cause and effect continuum is freedom from karma, the law of cause and effect. There is no logic in the soul space.
“In shallow men the fish of little thoughts cause great commotion. In oceanic minds the whales of inspiration make hardly a ruffle,” Sri Yuketeswar once told Yogananda as a student, quoting from the hindu scriptures (Autobiography of a Yogi, page 133).
The thought pattern landing in the shallow mind, can impact an entire lifetime and cause ripples than span many incarnations. Sovereignty requires the expanse of the oceanic mind to which nothing can attach. Instead effortless, logic-less action undoubtedly comes from the omnipresent God within us, the soul.
Through witnessing the thought patterns jump in contagion of human actions and reactions, I have seen, first hand, this does not only exist within human groups, yet it has become even more pronounced within the spiritual groups I have participated in, with even more implications.
People who have declared themselves karma free, myself included, become even more susceptible to such a disease of thought because they are no longer looking for it. As we end the cycle of our seemingly required lifetimes on Earth, maintaining the oceanic mind and the open communication channel of the independent soul's vibrations becomes a practice of the highest significance, as our self-realization depends on it.
As I move deeper into my sovereignty, it is with greater awareness of how this law of cause and effect – one many have declared is no longer theirs – impacts and shapes the embodied enlightenment experience. It is nothing short of fascinating. This truly is the grandest adventure to be had on Earth - the return to SELF.
1. The Breath (Pranayama): Deep breathing is the easiest, quickest, and most essential tool in regulating energy within the body. I can use my breath to move stuck energy, balance all areas within my body of consciousness, my space of awareness of SELF.
Breath also provides energy for the human experiences and expressions, and it can refill my creative tank. Like wind in propelling the sails of a ship, the breath can provide momentum for my soul creations to manifest in physical form – as I create from source. In fact, with each breath, I can connect deeply to the source energy within me, tapping into the omnipresent God space within me. Plus, it feels really good.
2. Food, or lack thereof: At least once a week, I go an extended period of time without food, most likely 18-24 hours. When I find myself in a state of hunger, I can watch how I refuel my proverbial tank with alternate sources of energy, preferably energy from the source of who I AM – from my I AM presence. Beyond the breath filling my tank, I find this allows me to regenerate the cells, filling them with light, and finally, transmuting the cells into light. This light energy propels my soul creations outside of human constructs of linear time, duality, and gravity.
3. Sense of Focus -- Expanded Awareness: Discerning what I am focusing on at a human level and a soul level allows me to identify “false” sources of energy - like praise or people agreeing with me and my human opinions. It allows me to identify energy leaks - places in which my sense of focus are draining my energetic makeup. Outside of focus, I go into expanded awareness of the totality of SELF, of the universe of SELF.
I observe and ask questions, like, what aspects and facets are at play? I sense into the physical body, down to my toes, as being grounded is not always easy for me. Then I scan the energetic body to the edges of the universe of me. In this space, my soul often reminds me that my human body is a projection, one made of light, rather than of physical matter governed by human laws, such as the calories in, calories out concept. I can mold and shape my reality at will, including the “physical” body, as long as I am tapped into the source energy, the ever-abundant, ever-flowing fountain inside of me.
4. Relationships: Finding time to spend alone in the universe of SELF, knowing myself deeply down to the core of who I am – the I Exist – is essential for knowing what is mine and what is not mine – discerning what belongs to me and what is a projection from others. After some time alone when I choose to interact with other beings, I am then really clear on the dynamics in and around me. I have found focusing on what is not mine, expends too much energy. I choose to focus instead of allowing self-love (that’s mine!). It is an economy of movement within SELF that creates the expansion in which self-love can flow freely.
5. Self-Love: When the ineffable love of the soul radiates through the universe of me, it is reflected back to me in every interaction, leaving me full of light, not heavy with gravity-laden matter, such as repeating thoughts and a heavy physical body.
6. Compassion. A lack of compassion is the source of all energy leaks. Compassion is honoring everything occurring within our body of consciousness, everything we observe seemingly going on outside of us – without trying to change it. There are no should or supposed to's for SELF or others. A lack of compassion begets judgments; judgments beget an overly mental focus and the subsequent human emotions, which create energetic leaks from inside the universe of SELF. In turn, energy leaks are a gift, which show me, allow me to self-realize I AM AT ONE (at-one-ment, atonement) with and in SELF always - when I expand my awareness rather than staying so long in focus (constriction) on what is immediately before me.
7. Doing – Allowing – Being: Doing is necessary in the world we live in. Financial investments require the diligent servant, the brain, to complete, and allow me to travel freely about the world. After doing, I find I move into a state of allowing. Allowing is relaxing into the "what is," without the energetic expense of resistance, or the human desire to change or fix anything. Then naturally, from that state, I find I flow into BEING. At its pinnacle BEING is a state of Samadhi, or pure bliss, accompanied by a deep sensational knowing, all is well in all of creation. It is a space in which the mind and all human attributes are suspended in stillness, ready to reclaim when they might serve me again. From this space, all energy within the body of consciousness, within the universe of me, turns to light, to source energy, in which I can consciously create my reality, the movie screen that plays before me each moment in this glorious human life.