 To archive from a Keahak post on January 5, 2018... For me, a major part of this embodied enlightenment experience is about surrendering the perceived human control mechanisms and to stepping into divine unfolding of the all that is (me). Like Tobias said so many years ago, you will want to have both human free will and divine will, but you cannot have both. Just a few short months ago, I felt the last of my perceived human free will dissolve into the Self, the Universe of Me, my body of consciousness. For me, the space of divine will is the space of creation from no-thing - the Ahmyo life of not being beholden to anyone or anything or even energy. In this space you do not need materials to create. It is the difference between building something with energy and creating in soul expression. Stick with me for a short story, if you will... When I was pondering no energy creation (not new energy creation, no energy creation) laying in bed one night, I saw creation as a blooming flower. The seed begins to sprout and the petals unfold one at a time until the flower can no longer hold itself constricted and simply bursts open in bloom. Adamus in the last keahak brought up talking with the master. It is something I have written about and when I had clients, it was something I taught to hundreds of people. In the space of divine will, I no longer need to have a "new energy" business to do this. I no longer need a business. At all. These master - human conversations are also something Adamus introduced a long time ago in the book, Act of Consciousness. I must say I was compassionately surprised people where not already talking to their master selves or inhabiting them in the body of consciousness since he has spoken so much about it. I also have a huge compassion for Adamus being so lovingly committed to repeating himself until we all get it. Wow and thank you. This conversation between the human and the master is so beneficial. However, there is a caveat. What I see with having to mechanize conversations with the human and soul is that it can go two ways or both ways. It can coax the flower into blooming. It can be the water to the soil and the sun in the sky that supports this divine unfolding. If you allow it to be so. Yet, if it becomes too mental, too forced - as I have seen in my previous client work for many years - it can be like trying to glue the petals onto the flower mechanically, without allowing it to simply bloom. The application of the materials is always up to the listener, the student, the sovereign. Yet, something to ponder in creations as well. With compassion and from behind the short wall as I no longer take client work and can really remove myself, I see "masters" trying to build things instead of create things (through soul expression and for soul experience) in the same way. These "creators" (who are really excellent builders instead) raise funds to buy petals and glue. They say their soul's desire is to have these funds to buy the petals and glue that is needed to create the flower. Really this form of "creation" is the human's way. It's a conscious creation they say - one they are raising money for. Indeed, they are aware they are creating a flower, but it's fake. It's not really a flower, it's an illusion of a flower. It is the "master" who still exists within the veils of duality and the idea that energy is needed to create. What does the master creator look like outside of duality, gravity, linear time and space and without needing building materials to manifest. What is the difference between manifestation and creation? In no energy creation, you take a seed, one that you found while strolling peacefully on a walk. You plant it into the ground and say if it blooms that will be nice, if it doesn't, that will be nice, too. There is no attachment, no begging of the master, no needing to create a fundraiser for your creation. If it's the divine will of the I AM, to express itself in this blooming flower, the seed will begin to sprout. Each day it will grow a little taller. As it grows, the master does not feel attached to the outcome at all. It does not listen to or allow the begging and pleading of the human: "If I just had this flower, I will be whole. Please master make this flower bloom." That's not how it works, and eventually the human surrenders its perceived control to the "All that is" within themSelves. The perceived human control does not even try anymore, It has found its peace in union with the I AM. One petal in the bud will open under the glowing sun. The master may go on a long hike, gone for weeks, and then walking back down the path the master is surprised to find a fully bloomed rose bush to enjoy. He or she will say: "I had forgotten all about the seed I planted. What a wonderful surprise!" The master laughs at the beautiful creative expression of Self - one he or she completely forgot about in the state of Being Enlightenment - and then sits down to enjoy his or her creation until it returns, disintegrates back into the soil from which it came. There is no need anymore to continue to build things. To raise money or charge clients for money to buy the petals and glue for your flowers. In the state of being - which I define as perpetual becoming - something dynamic and not static - the flower simply blooms if it is the will of the I AM. If it doesn't, the master continues BEING enlightenment. And it is a wonderful space to be in with no identity attachments being a conscious creator, who is nothing more than a more sophisticated builder than their fellow humans. Divine Will is the no energy creation is the ahmyo life is the ONE master and human, speaking with ONE voice.
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 Good morning, friends! This is a post I wrote for a Keahak forum and thus in their language not necessarily where we are here...
The following image was purchased and licensed - it is a painting of the creation of Adam or God's touch with finger, which is on the ceiling of a church in Thailand (February 28, 2015). I chose it because you all know deeply the God, also. Looking at the image, for example, I see myself as both the God and the carbonized Adam. The God before it passed through the Wall of Fire to have the experience of a solid existence within the veils of maya. As defined by Tobias via Crimson Circle, the wall of fire is the expansion of consciousness or knowingness beyond itself; a metaphor for the doorway leading from home into the void. The zone we crossed through going from the first circle of oneness to the second circle - place for human free will to play out among many other experiences. Again, more limited metaphors because it is so hard to grasp the sensation in words. And then in realization, in embodied enlightenment, to experience the understanding, with a less than one-degree shift of perspective, that I actually never left the wall of fire, and as God, also, I am simply viewing my creation that is realization in this human form, too. More on that another time... In my awakening and in my human life, I would continually - as a pattern deeply rooted in my gravity and duality laden sphere of awareness - choose experiences over and over again, and then subsequently look for creative solutions to make my way out of them. The cause and effect -- karma -- way of living. And my human self quite enjoyed it, experience junkie that it is. I remember my twenty-eight year old human self standing at the altar of marriage. I could hear my soul - master self to some - say, "We do not need to go through this - again. You don't have to choose this." The separation of voices has left but it was quite strong then... My human stood there, stomping her foot and said, "I will have this experience. I know it will likely end in a divorce, but this is what I am choosing for myself right now." I was that self aware and yet I chose this path of most resistance - again. But why? Why would I put myself into the proverbial crystal again? Oh yeah, to have the high of getting myself out of it -- once again. Four years into the marriage, I knew I had to get out of this bind. I was in a horrifically limiting experience. The master self never said I told you so, but I certainly felt it's wisdom. I called upon my gnost - the creative solution - to pull me from this experience. Oh, and what an experience it was! I created bigger and better this time. Look at me go:P My ever patient soul, or master self, said, okay - once again. It created a path for me to find a really nice place to live, a high income that did not require a job or effort. And with some tears and grit, I created a doorway to walk through into my freedom. It seemed so masterly at the time (and it was a path to freedom that served), yet looking back, it was just another loop in the experience and subsequent creative solution pattern to get myself out of it the experience I no longer wanted - again. Sigh. Yet, once I was in the freedom space, instead of taking a deep breath and simply being in joy, I created more and more experiences to create my way out of. I'm sure you can relate. Being broke, time and again, to see how, when, and if you pull yourself out of it. Getting into sticky living situations, karmic relationships, health issues...anything to feed the addiction to the experience - creative solution cycle. In Keahak and the last Shoud, Adamus talked a lot about testing yourself - stop testing yourself and your worthiness. Well, I already had just in the last six months, linear time. But what I didn't understand, what I had not yet embodied, was WHY, WHY now do I stop diving into the pattern of experience and creative solution to free myself from the experience. That answer, for me, is self-worth, a subtle yet with so much depth caress of self-love in the deepest parts of who I am, an exhaustion from the patterned cycle, and most of all, the ineffable experience knowing I am God, also - an experience that pales in comparison to anything my human could have dreamed up in its highly limited imagination. Now I know why I stopped the cycle - the addiction to the local linear "Problem - creative solution format" that has been going on for eons and thousands of lifetimes. The stop to the pattern happened naturally and without analyzation by my human self - it is only in hindsight that I can write about it - I stopped the pattern to experience creation embodied and my deepest desire for what I might describe as a sovereign peace - complete peace in the human form without needing energy from anyone or anything. Sounds so simple, and it is, but the depths of it are infinite. Pondering it some more, living in human form beyond any suffering is the most radical creation I can fathom. To suffer is human, but if I am creating any last human experience it would be this one. This is the JOY.... As I pondered this in the tomb of awareness - the shower! - I asked my soul, my master self, my human and my I AM (what I am calling the Infinite I with one voice) what it truly desired. There were no words, but if I had to pick them, they would be peace - not a human type of peace, but the peace that comes from pure joy - the joy of being - without being beholden to anyone or anything or any energy or any tie - also called the ahmyo life. PEACE - freedom from patterns, freedom from experience addiction. PEACE:) And the magic in all of this is not a tool or trick and definitely not a complicated formula. The magic of being, of creation from being, is that creation flows like a cool coastal breeze on a hot summer's day across the "Infinite I" - the Infinite I being me as one without the multiplicity of parts - human, divine, I exist and so on and so on... The creation comes in glorious waves to surf in the absolute pure pleasure of knowing I never left the wall of fire. In the divine perspective, I never became fragmented though the repeating experiences of thinking I was not one - yet they had served me so well. The creation comes from seeing through the eyes of the divine and the eyes of the human simultaneously - the vision of the Infinite I. And, the waves are simply created from the joy of being, radiating from the Infinite I that is free of patterns, that has "recovered" from the experience addiction (another way to grasp at outside energy) and to create from the no thing. I think about the physical action of swimming. One usually pushes off the wall of the pool or floor of the ocean to get the momentum to start swimming. In human existence, we would create experiences to get the energy flowing, to catapult us into the next experience. In creation, we no longer need the momentum, so we no longer need to collect human experiences. We simply swim in our own sovereign pool of creation. I wouldn't be me if I did not add a human anecdote, yet I do so with a big ***** the human condition does not matter, when you have moved beyond the human condition. Not in just theory, yet in the space between the cells and radiating to the edges of your infinite consciousness. In your terms, I have been "benching" a lot. Complete relaxation in the infinite Now, in the infinite Self. I recently stayed at the Four Seasons - a very posh hotel - for the weekend. I had such a nice experience in self-love there, I simply felt a notion in the depths of me and in total nonchalance softer than a whisper that I should like to do more of that - in between camping expeditions, of course. My monthly income doubled the next week. There you go. How did I do that, I wondered in hindsight. My wisdom said, "You swiped left." Swiping left is a urban slang term for saying I am not interested. It took me some days to realize what that meant. I swiped left on collecting yet another human experience. I swiped right for soul creation. No energy momentum or force needed. Energy serves me with out the need for movement, momentum, or force. Now, some who might still be in the pattern of experience and creative solution, might lose that money as quickly as it came. In the space of cavernous self love, it simply multiplies. I do not need it. I did not ask my master self for it. I was not in the space of needing or wanting a creative solution to save me from an experience I no longer desired. I was completely in love with my current experience without needing the creative solution out of it. Nor did I ask my master self for the partner in my life - a sovereign breath of fresh air. Not ever romantic or euphoric like the old karmic (cause and effect) kind, it has always been good. It has always been easy. There has never been a fight or a grab at energy. A steadily sublime experience. I did not need him just like I did not need a massive bank account. I could have walked this planet with a backpack and few dollars and felt the same - for my depth is now found in the seemingly subtle - delicately complexly simple - rather than the harshness of the addiction to experience and digging your way out of the experience. No highs (euphoric) and lows (devastated) -- IT IS SIMPLY JOY -- and there is no converse, or flip side of the coin, on that spectrum of awareness and in the state of BEING. Is it time to swipe left? Or continue swiping right to hook up with that next experience fix? Ah, it doesn't matter anyway. In honor of you! Post script: After writing this post, I started to realize how this ties into the biological body for me. Am I continuing to choose another body experience of needing outside energy, of being not sick but not well either. How can I swipe left on yet another biological body experience and instead, choose creation of the body of beyond? Breathing...  Watching the June shoud with my partner in Poland, I was struck with the service Edith provided for those stuck literally in figuratively in their chairs. As a collective consciousness of beings choosing the embodied enlightenment experience, we often talk of patterns, limits, and moving beyond old beliefs, yet we rarely talk about the most terrifying thing of all - what happens when we move beyond them! My friend Xanthe made a small comment that sparked a desire, a flame in me to talk about one of the most terrifying things of all - once you break those patterns and beliefs you will not have your "chair" at the party anymore. Your chair, if you even have one anymore, is way out in what I somewhat jokingly call the Sovniverse. It's a place of true freedom, but also feels like it has no floor, no ceiling, and no relative bearing in the reality from which you perceived yourself while still in the limits. This knowingness inspired the following post on social media... " One of the rarely if ever mentioned facets of moving beyond limits of abundance or worth or any flavor of lack, is when you do so you also leave the perceived safety of a group consciousness. As long as your still “getting there” you still belong to the group “on their way” to something that was never a destination but a way of being. Without limits and lack, there you are in your sovniverse (sovereign universe of SELF) with nothing but you. Sounds so nice and it is but terrifying to the human to be so out there/ so in here that the group identity dissolves completely." Someone responded that yes, you could be in the sovniverse AND in the groups and it is so true yet it's also so false, at the same time. Right now in this experience of realization I find that I can swim into mass consciousness and back out without "losing" myself. Similarly, I can swim into a spiritual/ conscious group and maintain sovereign energy, knowing deeply what is mine and what is not mine. However, there is a difference. The way I relate to others in groups like the Crimson Circle is completely different. In my lack, in my 'on my way to enlightenment' mentality I used to beLIEve, I felt a certain camaraderie - just like I did with my co-workers when I worked at a non-profit organization. I do not feel that anymore with my human friends - although I love them and still hang out with them from time to time. But even more so, I do not relate to Shuambra anymore - not in the way I used to. It's a very similar relationship I have to my singularly human friends and my mother. I love Shaumbra. I appreciate the company and the shared language of consciousness, but I feel no connection other than pure sight (I see you for who you truly are) to Shaumbra anymore. I no longer feel like a Shaumbra though I am deeply involved in the Crimson Council. Hanging out with a lovely human friend or a Shaumbra or my mom -- It's all the same to me. And in that shift, the deep connection I had to a group - which was such a cool experience that served me so very well - no longer is part of my experience. Getting there was terrifying at times as the group conscious was my safety net on days of doubt, days I felt like I might die, days I wondered if I had made the whole thing up. Plus, when a community feels you start to withdraw from a group, things can get real ugly. When you say I don't need this group anymore AND in fact, my soul is deeply calling me to be alone in myself, people who still cling to the group for safety will react. Even when you know it's all about them and not you, it can still be quite unpleasant for the human. Yet, when you cross the Threshold, the fire breathing dragon takes care of it all. In the soverniverse, you have no security blankets. I felt my human self trying to grab at a net - a safety net from any where - in this free fall. When I didn't find one, I threw my hands up in the air and yelled "whee!" Fuck it. This is what I'm here for. Not for friends, not for a group experience, I am here for ME! You free fall until you create the bottom for yourself to stand on - or choose not to - allowing yourself to flail in unknown bliss within the GRANDness of our own Being-ness. Or more likely, both and a whole lot more! In honor of you! |
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Lauren (Sar'h) writes adventure novels and short stories about the embodied enlightenment experience. She fancies herself a humanizing divinity journalist and DJ, and shares that work joyously on this page. Archives
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